Nintendo Announces New Evolution Of Charmander ‘Gerrymander’ Which Is Unbeatable Due To His Ability To Randomly Change Battle Rules
TOKYO — The Pokémon Company today announced that new games Pokemon Scarlet and Pokémon Violet will introduce a new alternate evolution of Charmander, Gerrymander, which will be completely unbeatable due to its ability to randomly change combat rules.
“Gerrymander can be obtained by trading a Charmander to another player while letting them hold a wad of money from a political lobbyist in their hands, and once you do that you literally can never lose,” said Takato Utsunomiya, COO of The Pokémon. Company, in a surprise Pokémon Presents video that aired on YouTube. “If you try to attack one with a Water-type attack, for example, it will temporarily change the laws of physics with its special gerrymandering ability so that water no longer extinguishes fire. vulture, their stringy necks and leathery devil-like wings can be frightening, but this should just remind players of their fearsome strength and power in any situation.
Players say they fear Gerrymander will upset the balance of competitive play and make it difficult to complete the pokédex in later episodes of the series.
“It looks like you won’t be able to catch a Gerrymander in the wild because it will totally reverse the mechanical function of a pokeball when cornered,” said Randall Fuqua, a top contributor to the r/pokemon subreddit. “And it seems the only way to get money for political lobbyists is to ride a bike and negotiate with the Pokémon House of Parliament, which won’t even be available as downloadable content until next year. At least Missingno broke the old games in a fun way, but Gerrymander feels like a sharp reminder that life just isn’t fair.
Despite the influx of negative feedback, The Pokémon Company remains adamant that creating Gerrymander was a good idea.
“We understand that some players are upset with this new character, but according to a user survey we just launched on our website within five minutes of this special announcement, Gerrymander’s approval ratings are through. We find it hard to believe that Gerrymander is responsible for the unhappiness of a vocal minority online, but we hope our fans stay engaged and continue to make their voices heard in the world of Pokémon for years to come.
As of press time, the Pokémon Company has announced that it will make it easier to complete the pokédex by giving away Gerrymanders for free via Mystery Gift at select GameStop locations only to the wealthiest zip codes in America.